diagnostics

we interrupt our regular programming to invite you consider the possibility that your struggles cannot be explained away by the current diagnoses and that you may have something altogether different and more complex running around inside that queer head of yours something altogether different and more complex than garden-variety anxiety and depression see the issue may not be serotonin after all but rather dopamine and given your answers to this test this test this test yes another test lead us to believe that indeed you are even further away from what we call normal than we had initially thought now try this new concoction of medication there’s a good girl come on back in a fortnight and let us know whether you felt more subdued in which case we are correct or whether you felt like your heart was beating so fast it would break out of your chest at any second in which case we are incorrect and you will have experienced two weeks’ worth of speed-living and we apologise in advance but this is the only way we can know for sure and it’s for your own good that we interrupt our regular programming to invite you to consider the possibility that your struggles cannot be explained away by the current diagnoses